Life…really?

When I woke up this morning I knew that there was something that I needed to do, go to work, check my messages, open mail, and make sure my bills were handled…wait what did I forget? OHHHH…to live…breathe..be in my skin..how could I forget that..

The sad thing is that I seem to forget to live a lot…I get so overwhelmed by what is required of me that I don’t remember to take a breath and smell the daises or roses…whateva…

I generally wake up on a good mood..with peace on my mind..and a prayer to God in my heart..usually. After that 3 minutes my mind becomes filled with the utter pressures of the world. I can tell others all day that they need to meditate, pray, delegate you know share your work….lol.. But in reality these are some of the hardest things to do..especially for yourself.

I know as I approach 47 years, that I should be at a place in my life that I should slow down and begin to live a more laid back life….right? Wrong because obviously being on the move, and hustling is a trait I received from my Mother…Love her…

I joke and say I will rest when I am dead…not a good joke I know, but if I don’t having something going on…I have a bad habit of feeling guilty about that…is that me or the world? I think it is me because I have not been one to succumb to peer pressure. I do have an instinct to survive..that is very very strong. My twin and I are so much alike, because he is like me, but he had learned how to take a break..I have not gotten there yet..

I don’t want to grow much older and think that I worked my life away, but at the same time, it takes work to be able to do the things you want…

I am learning how to pick my battles and to slow down on somethings, but I will not stop striving to take care of my family. I cannot, will not, and that is the way it should be..

God has my back, front and sides and he is my strength. If you know me then you know it is coming up on 8 years since my TIA. I was so weak from the brain injury that I never thought that I would be able to do things for myself or others. Slowly over the years that has changed and I look for opportunities to serve others. I feel like that is my purpose on Earth and I will serve until I can no longer breathe…

Are you living?

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